Peace with Myself

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I’m not always happy with myself. How about you? Oh, I’m not talking about the fact that I am never happy with my hair {a whole other story}. I’m talking about inside me.

I have a tendency to want to do it all; to have expectations of myself that are too lofty or unrealistic. At times, I look at others and wonder why they are able to _____ and I can’t manage to ____.  But I can’t do it all. No one can. God didn’t design me to do it all. He designed me to lean on Him.

So how do I have peace with myself? By prioritizing! Who am I right now in this season? What are my priorities in this season? I’m going to focus on those.

I found an alterations shop that has reasonable prices and have gotten to know the owner quite well. I am her most unique customer. While other customers come in with pants to be hemmed and clothes to be dry cleaned, I show up with a torn princess dress, a button to be sewn on pants, a fairy wand with ribbons needing repairs, a pillow with a hole, Barbie clothes that need their seams fixed and more! Before, I would have put it in a pile to try and get to. I felt no peace, knowing I had that pile looming over me. When I did get to a repair or two, it was badly done and time-consuming.  I had no peace or satisfaction over my ‘accomplishment’. Now, I take my bag of oddities to the seamstress, hand over a few dollars and come back to pick it up the following day. It’s done fast, right and it leaves me with a feeling of peace.

It’s ok that I can’t sew! Rather than being all over the place mentally -  planning for this, wishing to do that and beating myself up because I can’t get to this or that, I’m going to focus only on my primary two roles of wife and homeschooling mother.  I really want my energy to be channeled into these areas. That means I am not going to lament the fact that I haven’t yet went back to piano lessons as I had planned, learned to sew, started the bible college course I had hoped to do. Right now is not the time for me to learn to sew. I accept and embrace that truth and it brings me peace. 

What do you need to let go of or embrace today?


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