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I’m Inadequate
Christian, wife, mother, blogger, happy, optimistic, friendly, thankful…
If asked to describe myself in one word, I might use any of those words because they are all true. But in my heart of hearts, if I needed to choose one word to describe myself it would be inadequate.
As a Christian, I’m inadequate. When I look at the cross and see what He did for me there, when I look around at the many undeserved blessings that fill my life and then I look at myself, my offerings, my feeble works and know that I am inadequate in my Christian life. I am not always faithful in my devotions, I know I fail to seize every opportunity to share the gospel and it goes without saying that sometimes it is not Christ that others see in me.
My feelings of inadequacy extend into my marriage. I am not always the helpmeet I should be to my husband. I can not say that I always put his needs before my own. At times I’m not as respectful as I should be, or as quick to forgive. A times, his priorities are not mine, when they ought to be!
I am blessed to be called mommy but completely inadequate to do the job. Sometimes I’m sharp, my tone impatient. My tongue is not always the law of kindness. Sometimes my choices are wrong and my judgments do not mirror His mercy and grace.
Gideon was inadequate
On Sunday, our Pastor’s message was from Judges 6. His direction was a little different that what I got out of it but that is the way the Holy Spirit works isn’t it? I was reminded that scripture is full of inadequate men and women. It’s not about them {or you or me!} but about God.
- Gideon wasn’t seeking to do great things. He was hiding from the Midianites just trying to survive. (Judges 6:11)
- Gideon came from a poor family and was the least in that family (Judges 6:15)
- He did not exhibit great faith (Judges 6:13)
- But God was with him (Judges 6:16)
- Gideon and his band of 300 went into battle with trumpets, pitchers and lamps. Inadequate tools for battle to be sure! (Judges 7:20)
- They defeated the 135 000 Midianites without doing battle. They simply stood there. (Judges 7:16-25)
The Upside to Inadequacy
It’s not about me or about my capabilities {or lack thereof!}. God has given me the gifts and blessings in my life because of who He is (James 1:17). I didn’t do anything to earn my salvation; it was a gift because I was inadequate! My husband and children are gifts from the Lord, and through His strength can I be what I need to be.
I’m inadequate and that is OK. It’s better than OK; it’s great! Acknowledging my inadequacy means that I am acknowledging my need to rely on Christ and, that apart from Him, I can do nothing! (John 15:5) Depending more on Him each day is what He desires so that He can conform me to His image!
God is looking for those who are inadequate, humble and empty of themselves. He wants to fill them, exalt Himself through them and accomplish great and mighty things for His kingdom through them!
I’m thankful for the bible and for the words of encouragement and direction it contains for me. I’m thankful that I don’t need to be adequate, because HE is!
- This post is linked to Gratituesday and 30 Minute Blog Challenge
Oh, how this post resonates with me. I often fel inadequate – unable to support and be pleasant with my husband at times, failing to do all I wish to to train my children in faith as well as home preschooling, unable to cut through clutter and get to organization, lacking balance in my roles as Mom, Wife, Homemaker, Independent Contractor, etc… Sometimes, I even go as far as to wonder why God has gifted me with another child growing inside. I wonder why He thinks I can be a good mom to this child when I am so achingly inadeuate at fulflling my roles as they now stand with but two children, home, husband, work and community. Then, I realize all my roles are gifts and that when I have a poor attitude I am being ungrateful for these gifts. i recognize that God gives each one of us no more than we can handle and all the love, support and guidance we need to handle all things and then some. My greatest obstacles are obstinence and absentmindedness – I sometimes refuse to hang things over or forget to pray. Ah, but when I do, I am so grateful. So at peace. So inspired to live and give as God wishes me to. I recognize what blessings His word, His will, His forgiveness, His love and His everpresent directionals are. And, I, too, see the sound advice and guidance in the greatest gudebook at all. Self-help? Who needs it when we have God help? Thank you for putting it all so eloquently this morning.
I hear you! I feel totally inadequate most of the time. And constantly reminding myself that it’s not about me, anyway, it’s all about doing God’s work, and I should be satisfied with that.
In my life when I struggled with this I claimed some verses. The struggle never seems to go away for long.
(I think satan uses this struggle to try discourage & neutralize us.)
Paul talked in 2 Corinthians 12 about the battles he faced.
We just need to remember our callings are filled with promises from God to do His purpose & He through grace allows us to do our best & we trust Him (no matter what we SEE) to do the rest….. it is not enough to believe….
we must actively trust. Ps 121 came to my mind as I battled @ the time of my dad’s death. Inadequate is how I felt…as I could no longer right wrongs or just do those extra things any more. Had I done enough? There were no more chances to correct anything I felt was left undone. THAT is where I believe God also gave the grace to grieve.
We all battle these things (granted not the same way for each person). And this is not bad. We just all need to remember we were NOT made to be self sufficient. THAT brings disaster. And sometimes the reason’s we get to that point is because we are loading on stuff ourselves that God never intended us to do all & certainly not all at one time.
When He gives us callings….He gives us all needed.
He also reminds us to ask…..He does meet all our needs.
The world will beat you up…God will lift you up;-)
Have a great day…you have many garden’s growing
to tend to;-)
We just were reminded of this in my Bible Study this morning! We were talking about Moses & his feelings of inadaquacy. What good news that Christ is sufficiant!! I don’t have to be!
Great post! It is very true and I think that feeling that way keeps us on our knees where we belong! So many times, I am saying to God that I have no idea what I am doing… Praise God that He does!
Blessings!!!
Amy @ Things and Stuff
Thank you for this post and honesty. The inadequacy overflows in this house too. It’s such a hard thing to deal with. Sigh…I am thankful God is good because He makes up for all of my junk. I really appreciate you sharing!
~Mimi